Sunday, January 26, 2014

Depth

Daddy is a perfect fit. I love to take him all in and have him tell me that he knows his penis is the one I've been waiting for. When we make love, I am overwhelmed by emotion. It is like getting to an oasis after being thirsty for days. Nothing or no one else could quench my desire. 

When we get to spend an afternoon laying in bed together. I in his arms, us sharing stories.. nothing else matters. 

Beyond sex, Daddy and I have growing depth to our relationship which I treasure.

Things i have learned that help:

Accept someone for who they are. No one will change, or should need to change, for us. We all grow and change in time, and relationships are a give and take. In the meantime, to be constantly annoyed or angry at our partner, is pointless. It's not fair to them, it's not fair to us, and it's damn miserable of a life to settle on.

Make yourself happy. Daddy makes me happier... so much happier... and I thank God for Him. Still, He wouldn't be able to do that if I wasn't somewhat happy already. Looking to someone else to save us and make us happy, is a solid foundation for a house made of sand.

Pick your battles and truly let the rest go. Relationships take work, and that involves disagreements, misunderstandings and conflict at times. The battles we pick need to be few and far between. Otherwise, like the boy who cried wolf, our arguments lose meaning, and go from being helpful to draining. 


We create the life we want, and we accept the love we think we deserve. Long as we have a partner willing to grow and learn with us, we have all the tools necessary for a healthy mature relationship.

Saturday, January 18, 2014

Terms of endearment

Daddy is careful with his words. He says what he means and doesn't say too much extra stuff.

I'm more of a circular talker. I often say a whole bunch of things that really probably could be said much simpler, but that's just how I tend to express.

He though keeps things short and to the point.

Well, recently he has said two things to me that melted my heart and made me feel so very special. And both involved a few simple but powerful words.

On New Year's Eve, he addressed me as his love.

Then last night he addressed me as "beautiful."

I am not too great with compliments. So, when he called me beautiful I felt wonderful inside, and still also felt the need to correct him and tell him no I'm not beautiful. I wish I were as smooth and calm as he is with expressing how I feel. But then again, he accepts me as I am and probably wouldn't want to be dating his exact replica.

My favorite term of endearment for Him is simply Daddy. Although sometimes I do like to call him babe.

Monday, January 13, 2014

Weight

I struggled with body image issues since i was 11. Not because I was really even overweight. But my dad made some comment about how I was overweight... (i was just going through puberty and no longer the pre-pubescent girl he loved). So, I spent the next TWO decades of my life in the throws of eating disorder (to the point it messed up my thyroid and liver levels on blood tests).

I got help. I got better. Still, some things you never fully "get over." You just learn to accept, forgive and be kind to yourself.

Well, Daddy... is amazing... because he could not care LESS how much I weigh. He told me he dated a woman more than twice my size. I said "Really???" He said yea.. nonchalantly like he does. 

I love him. I love he doesn't care how much I weigh. I love his main concern is that I am emotionally healthy! What a concept, what a blessing.

Struggling with hating myself since age 11 is not easy. But today I know I have sooo much to be thankful for. And, to have met a man who loves me, not my weight or body fat percentage... makes me glad I never fully gave up on God. 

All young women, and mature women, need to understand how special we are based on our character, not our looks!

Saturday, January 11, 2014

Home

He is nonchalant. Can be. He is passionate in bed. He is fun and interesting in conversation. In day to day relationship matters, he is nonchalant. Things that may get others anxious simply do not get him unglued.

I am temperamental. Can be. I am focused and calm in bed. I am smart and level headed in discussions. In day to day relationship matters, I am temperamental. Things that others wouldn't get too upset by, I become unglued.


So, of course, the universe has us meet. And it is passionate and wonderful and also not without challenges.

We've had two maybe three heart to heart conversations about where things stand between us. Tonight was the most recent one. He is amazing about talking through things. I am blessed. He heard my side, I heard his side. (We both are really on one side because we can't get away from our feelings for each other). He agreed to be more sensitive to my feelings. I agreed to make more effort to be rational. In a nutshell.

We had amazing sex. I have never felt so into it than tonight.

Who knows what the future holds? It doesn't exist. And the past is the past. What matters is we are both trying. And I've honestly never really had a relationship like that, where both are making a genuine effort. It's refreshing. And scary too. Because the more I invest my feelings, the more I have to lose.. but also to gain..

When we were making love tonight, I whispered "Daddy, daddy" softly and he couldn't hear me. He asked me to repeat what I said, so I said it louder "Daddy.. daddy.."  Him inside me and knowing he is my Daddy.. just feels like home.